Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Zumba girls

I spoke about my first Zumba experience in one of my latest vlogs which of course included my uncomfortable first time out with no padded bra. To reiterate, Zumba is an aerobic workout that includes dance steps from many different types of music combined with sexy butt wiggling, hip shaking goodness.

Last night was my second time attending. This time, I had purchased a new sports bra from Victoria's Secret that actually had cups and it succeeded in giving me much more confidence than the first time I had gone. I also acquired some capri yoga pants to wear instead of the short shorts I had worn the last time.

As I headed into Safeway to buy a bottle of water and get cash out to pay for Zumba, I felt amazingly assured of myself and my femininity. When I got to the gym, the guy at the counter addressed me and another lady that came in as "ladies" and I signed in and paid. The room where we usually have Zumba had emptied earlier than last time so we all went into the room right away.

Once in the room, I found myself surrounded by 25 or more girls, all socializing in grps of 2, 3, and 4. I found myself standing alone, awkwardly at first but after some time, one of the ladies near me held her tummy and said to the other girls she was talking to "I still haven't gotten rid of THIS". I saw my opening. I held my own stomach and agreed that I hadn't either. She looked at me, laughed, and said "Oh right, miss cutie petutie here, like you really need to lose any!" . I laughed and said well I think I do and we all agreed that it doesn't matter what size we are, we always think we could lose some. =)

Thus began my conversation with 3 girls who all introduced themselves to me. As we chatted about random things, I found myself becoming much more comfortable. I also realized that I was not being seen by these girls as "the transgender girl" but as "that really tall skinny girl" and that was definitely better.

During the workout itself, I found myself looking in the mirrors on the wall and noticing how much taller I was than everyone in the room and it kind of reinforced to me how these girls all probably saw me. The word "beanpole" kept running through my head. It's not a bad thing, also not a good thing, but better than being seen as "that tg girl" or even "that guy". *shudder*

By the end of the workout, I was completely beat and ready for bed as was expected. We all had a good laugh at my cute little water bottle that was totally dry and had been for the last quarter of the workout. As I headed out to my car, one of the girls I'd just met turned back and waved and said "Bye Debra!". I waved goodbye and told her it was nice meeting her.

In summary, it feels really good to be involved in activities with other women. I think it's something I've always longed for as a part of my own femininity. On another note, even with small breasts, I really need to be happy and confident in myself. That confidence emanates from me when I have it and I don't think anybody questions that I'm a woman in those times. Having that confidence all the time? I seem to still have a ways to go to get to that level.

As a final note, if you are interested in Zumba check it out at http://www.zumba.com . The instructor that I have experienced so far has been awesome and her Zumba page is here: http://26583.zumba.com/ .

5 comments:

Petra Bellejambes said...

That is a big, big win. Clearly, you are in the club. Thanks for sharing.

All the best - Petra

Stace said...

Really happy for you - that must have felt brilliant.

And good luck with Zumba classes :)

Stace

Jessica De Leon said...

What a great story, I am very happy that you were able to experience this. I know that there are tons more to come :-)!

Debra said...

@Petra, @Jessica, @Stace - Thank you girls for the encouragement and love =)

Debra said...

@Lucy - Thank you for the compliments. I first went in shorts, t-shirt, and sports bra but most of the girls there were wearing yoga pants and a variety of t-shirts or tank tops so I adapted to that this last time with just sports bra, t-shirt, and capri yoga leggings.

Yes people tend to say I have gone through a quick transition....a little over a year ago I had no idea about any of this.

I just want to encourage you not to use me as a model because we all have our own journey, our own timeframe. But I am glad to be of any encouragement that you need, girl! That's partly why my posts are so open so that hopefully they can be of help to other girls. =)

As for the vlogging equipment, I use iMovie 09 on Mac OS X. It just works. =)

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